Puer Magi Thompson Magicae
by Oso el Peligroso
Summary: The end of summer rapidly approaching the gang comes together at the cemetery for one final late night of fun and games. The sky is rent open and everything changes. Is it selfish to wish for the bonds of friendship to become unbreakable?


The sun cast long shadows and fiery colors as Thompson wrestled with the heavy flannel blanket come to life with errant wind; his armpits, back, and front of his neck turning dark with moisture. The struggle was wrought of the drama only bard could string with stanzas of song ending in resounding victory as Thompson spread the blanket over the grassy knoll. He stood panting admiring his handiwork before taking off his shoes and stuffing his socks in them before using them as anchors for one of the corners. The tailored sod teased his soles playfully, he wiggled his bare toes as involuntary shivers of sensation tingled up his spine.

"Hey can I some of you guys lend me your shoes?"

"For what?" Robbie asked snidely.

"To keep the blanket, duh-" The repose had ended as a mischievous gust snatched the blanket up. "Nooooooo!"

Lee took gleeful notice of the commotion, "Go Thompson! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo!" The rest of his friends united in watching the scene unfold.

"No, no, no no, no, no! Come back!" Heaving he pumped his legs faster then they were used to going nearly fast enough to nab the rebellious cloth. His right arm stretched straining for one one precious quarter inch, the tips of his fingers teased the possibility of cloth. He struggled to go faster still, finally his hands balling into tight fists as they were filled with fuzzy pattern part of which which tangled around his legs in one final act of defiance. His body lifted off of the ground for one glorious of flight before gravity brought him back down hard on the spongy grass. As he rolled down the remainder of the hill the blanket wrapped around him like an overzealous snake. Robbie, Wendy, Nate, Lee, and Tambry burst into hysterics.

Another moment of repose, a secret smile spread across his face at the "woops" and hollers directed at him. As the laughter dissipated and his breathing normalized he began the process of freeing himself from the manifested bonds. He felt hands assisting his own before seeing Nate's goofy face hovering over his own. Freed he grasped Nate's offered hand surprised at how easily the stringy boy helped him up. They walked back up together. Wendy took the bunched up blanket from under Thompson's arm, Tambry helped her lay it flat on the ground while Lee and Nate set up the picnic adornments. Even Robbie pitched in securing the corners with four sets of shoes.

Thompson moved to help finish set up but Wendy stopped him chuckling to herself.

"You've helped enough dude. Just sit down and relax. We got this."

He followed directions he plopped down crossed legged graciously thanking Lee who handed him a thick paper plate and utensils. One by one they situated themselves falling into a comfortable silence, enjoying their kinship, processed snacks, and personalized sandwiches.

Robbie broke the silence, "Now that everyone is done, lets compare who got who for homeroom." Uncrumpling a slip of paper from his pocket he read off, "Mrs. Zuckerburry. Aww man she's like _always_ crabby."

Looking at the others schedule Lee and Nate high fived, "We got her too!"

"Then why are you high fiving?"

"Cause we're all going to be together?"

Robbie rolled his eyes.

"Guess I'm stuck with you three losers." Wendy said playfully.

"Seems like we all ended up with Zuckerburry. Ready to start-" Noticing the concerned look on Tambry's face, Robbie stopped. "What's up, Tambry?"

"Mr. Beesly."

"Yeah what about him?"

"I have him for home room."

"What! But this means we aren't going to spend our mornings together."

"Probably for most of the day," Wendy interjected. "Isn't Mr. Beesly the AP teacher?"

"Yeah." Thompson answered hopefully through a mouthful of sandwich.

"Then-"

Robbie cut Wendy off. "Let me see that." He took the document out of Tambry's uncommitted grip. "We don't have one single class together! And we have three of the same teachers."

"Don't take it so hard Robbie, we'll still get to hang out in the mornings, at lunch, and after school."

"But how could this-"

"Tambry said chill dude, so chill." She looked over towards Thompson. "What's your schedule looking like man?"

"I got Mr. Beesly too."

"No way! You gotta trade with man, I'll do anything."

"Get a grip Robbie, there's no you are going to pass for Thompson here," She patted his ample stomach. "Besides you only had one class together last year."

"But that was before-"

"She's right Robbie, we'll just have an excuse to hang around more on our free time."

"I guess…." He felt his stomach and his eyes lit up with inspiration. "What if I stuffed pillows down my shirt and wore a hoodie?"

A second wave of mirth took the adolescents, Thompson's eyes widened as the particularly large bit of sandwich found its way down the wrong pipe. Nate and Lee respectively slapped his wide back not really helping. The rancorous coughing dislodged glob of food was coughed up before Wendy could reach him.

"Well now that we that Thompson is done trying to die on us, are we all up for a game of truth or dare?" Everyone settled down gathering in a circle. "One, two, three…SHOOT!"

Six hands were thrown towards the center of the circle, five palms flat facing the ground and a lone chubby fist.

"Aww man, how does this keep happening?"

"Welp it looks like you are up first Thompson."

"Fine…I pick, dare."

Everyone groaned.

"You always pick dare." Lee accused. "Yeah, why don't you pick truth for once?" Nate added.

Stomach churning, "But everyone knows that truth is boring, I'm being…daring!"

"Not when you _always_ pick dare." Tambry said looking up from her phone.

Regret added to the turmoil brewing in his digestive system, with finality he put down the mostly eaten sandwich. "If that is the way everyone sees it. T-truth."

Robbie stood without missing a beat and asked, "Do you have a crush on anyone?"

Heat flushed his face, particularly his ears and cheeks, at the inevitable question. "I uh…yes, yes I do."

"Whoahoho! Who is the lucky lady?" Robbie asked earnestly over the catcalls of the others.

"Wait a minute, that's not fair! You didn't ask who I had a crush on so I don't have to tell."

"Aww come on, we won't make fun of you."

He looked doubtfully at Robbie, "No. Follow the rules now guys."

Tambry took the voice of mercy halting the harassment of the apple cheeked boy, "Thompson has a point."

"I do?"

"You only asked if he had a crush and he answered you Robbie, next time think of the question through." Admonished, Robbie sat down. "Lee it's your turn."

No one contradicted Tambry, and the game resumed moving counter clockwise, each of the adolescents taking turns. Truths were divulged and dares challenged, good times flowed mostly unbroken though the circle.

Thompson sat stiffly.

"Back to you Thompson, truth or dare?"

He did not like the look that Robbie was giving him, "Dare."

The edges of his mouth flashed a smirk before relaxing, "Kiss Wendy on the lips."

"What? No way!"

"Yeah, I'm not to crazy about that one either Robbie." Hastily she added, "No offense."

"Heh, never thought I'd see a Corduroy wuss out."

"Excuse me?"

"I thought you were brave is all, but I guess we all have our limits."

"Fine! Get over here Thompson. So help me, if you try and use tongue though."

Crablike he backed away breaking the circle, "I-I-I…I just don't…no! Can I change to truth?"

"Well…"said Robbie.

"I don't care as long as you all recognize that I am not the one wussing out."

"What was all that stuff from before about following the rules?"

"I was being a wuss, and I am an even bigger wuss going back."

"You don't have to be so down on yourself dude, I was only playing." Everyone leaned a little closer the air electric with anticipation. "Who do you have a crush on?"

Stomach knotting into a tightly packed fist filled with bubbling butterflies Thompson could feel the panic spreading. He closed his eyes inhaling deeply, two comforting arms covered with peach fuzz soft hair wrapped themselves protectively around his torso. Exotic perfumes, aromatic lotions, the faint smell of iconic fast foods, with an underlying _masculine_ musk wafted into his nostrils. _He doesn't count, it's not like I know him._ "No one, at least not really."

"Could it be? Ol'honest Tom has told us his very first lie?" Nate inquired not mockingly.

"No, it's true!" He could feel multiple pairs of doubtful eyes demolishing his weak resolve. "It doesn't count if I'll never actually meet them."

"Says who? The question is _who_ you have a crush on not who _can_ date you. You can have a crush on anyone."

"Or anything." Added Lee matter of factly.

"…Right. So spill the beans, we are all friends here right?" A murmur of agreement from the others."

"I guess you have a point…." He stole a nervous glance of Tambry's phone. "My crush its on…on…." They all leaned in close unwilling to miss the reveal. "On, on…oh I don't know his real name…but fine it's the Love God!"

Deafening thunder ripping though the still air forced the attention away from Thompson, a new fear grew in his stomach as he gazed at the rent sky above main street. A cross shaped tear blazed with otherworldly greens, oranges, and reds replacing the light from the sun.

"W-w-w-what's going on?" Thompson asked no one.

Transfixed with anomaly none of his friends offered an answer.

 _ **Thompson!**_

The familiar disembodied voice echoing inside of his mind caused him to heave, lunch threatening to evacuate his stomach. He held back lunch through the sheer will of his splintering mind.

 _ **It's Happening.**_

He retched again, a thin line of drool escaping the corner of his mouth.

The physical distress of their portly friend broke the spell of the chaotic sky. Sympathetically Wendy pat him on his back, "Don't stress too much, it's probably just some crazy shenanigans Dipper and his uncle are up to."

 _ **She's right, but it's far more dangerous than anyone knows.**_

"Look up and smile." said Tambry. An artificial click and blinding flash illuminating his palled face. "I'm tagging you right now, you look great."

 _ **Everyone you care about, everyone in town, everyone in this world is in danger!**_

"Did anyone catch that Thompson has a crush on the Love God?" Attentions shifted to Robbie. "Like, the Love God is that fat blonde cherub looking dude right?"

 _ **You can help them.**_

"Hey, that's right. You're into dudes like that?" No trace of malice in Nate's voice, only curious incredulity.

 _ **Make a contract with me.**_

Incised Wendy got into Nates face, "So what if he does? Geez, grow up guys."

 _ **Become a magical boy!**_

"Shut up!" Mostly concerned eyes turned back to him. "No, not you guys!" Wendy looked particularly hurt. "I swear I didn't mean you Wendy, I don't really care if I get ragged on. It was just stressful, stressful admitting that I'm g-g-g…that I liked dudes."

Screams carried on stale winds from town proper, faint and macabre shattered their teenaged melodrama. A bright blinding flash followed by a sickly shockwave tepid with palpable malice blew past them permanently changing the direction of the blades of grass. As their vision returned the large black spots dissipating revealing a gargantuan pyramid suspended in the alien sky turning lazily.

"What in the world?"

"I don't like the looks of that guys, lets get back to the van."

"Yeah let's do what Wendy says." Thompson said with quivering words, shot nerves threatening to black him out.

"Wait! Guys look at this!" Tambry said pointing her phone toward the center of town. They gathered around the LCD screen, beholding the surreal tear giving entry to unnatural horrors rallying under a triangular being.

"Is that the thing on the back of dollar bills?" Lee took out a crumpled dollar from his pocket, "Yeah, look it looks just like the pyramid on the back, eye and everything."

Tambry screamed and let the smart device slip from her grip, "Did you see what they did to Pacifica's dad?"

"Alright no more stalling let's get back to the van. We can figure out what to do there."

"Look out!" Thompson yelled.

A singular naked eye two scrawny batlike wings beating furiously swooped down at Tambry firing a beam from it's topaz irises.

"Robbie!" His body stiffened his skin turning ashen before their eyes. He fell atop her pinning her to the soft turf. "Oh my god, why Robbie?"

"Lee, Nate get him off of Tambry," She tumbled out of the way of the Bat-Eye who had turned its ire to her. Flourishing the blanket, she trapped the eye. Spinning to gather momentum she released the load launching it back to its origin.

"I'm not leaving without Robbie."

"We will come back for hi-"

"No!"

"Staying out here in the open is going to get us turned too, I don't think Robbie wants that to happen to any of us!" Wendy grabbed Tambry's shoulders and felt them stiffen and harden, from between their legs a creature lazily drifted. Wendy back flipped kicking it like an errant soccer ball. The Bat-Eye bounced off of Tambry's stone skin, her surprised expression an appropriate response to being kicked in the face with a ball.

"W-W-W-W-Wendy!"

It recovered quickly, "Not now Thompson!" Fending the abomination with the beach umbrella that had not disturbed the cemetery soil.

Lee and Nate fought in tandem defeating one before falling petrified on the green sod by unseen assailants, nary a scream escaped their mouths.

In the distance the water tower wailed, ripping itself free from normality. "No, no, no, no, no, no, no."

"Snap out of it or you'll be next." She grabbed his arm and began sprinting down the slope.

The steep angle of the hill, the slick grass, exponentially increasing stress, and adrenaline shot nerves caused one misstep. Thompson yelped as his weight bore down on his ankle, for the second time he tumbled down the hill taking Wendy with him.

Wendy was already back up as he got on his hands and knees, "Crap, I'm so sorry Wendy."

"Forget about it, can you get up? We gotta go!"

Grimacing through the sharp aching pains shooting up his leg he stood up, Wendy began moving towards the parking lot. "Wait." He avoided her determined eyes set afire as he fished out the keys and tossed them to her. "In case I don't make it."

"Don't talk like that. I am getting us out of here and we are going to come up with a plan to save the others." She did not toss back the keys.

The van sat unaware of the madness a short sprint away, Thompson started limping fear keeping him fairly mobile.

Wendy moved underneath his arm shouldering some of his ample weight, "You gotta recognize when you need to ask for help."

They moved together quicker then either thought would have been possible. Heavy beads of sweat formed and trickled down his face blurring his vision and stinging his eyes, he could feel wet spots redeveloping underneath his arms and wondered, _can she feel that? Is it going to gross her out and drop me leaving me to those things?_ Panting struggling to get oxygen to his muscles it took him a moment to realize he was standing in front of his mother's van. Tears joined the sweat racing down his chubby cheeks as he patted his pockets and found his ears absent of the familiar ring of jangling keys.

"Hey." The joyous chorus of metallic singing as if in defiance of the chaos unfolding about them. The doors whirled in brief life as she pressed the unlock button. A shadow casted its dark form over them, Wendy's eye's widened in horror. "Move outta the way!"

Thompson looked over his shoulder falling backwards in time to avoid the water towers metallic frame turned foot crushed the van, shards of glass and metal showered him slicing into his bare skin. "M-m-my moms car…."

"Not the time, get up they've almost caught up!"

"Nnnnuaghh." He got back to his feet wincing has his sprain screamed in protest, small streaks of blood flowing from newly made nicks and cuts. Three rocks zoomed past, close enough for him to feel the disturbances in the air.

" _Skreeee!_ " Three bat-eyes screeched from hidden orifices smacking into the ground writhing in pain.

"Thank-" Scooping up a scrap of metal from the wreckage he chucked it with all his might at the flying eye diving towards his friend.

"Ummphs." Hitting her square in the shoulder she crumpled down in pain narrowly avoiding the petrifying glaze of the monster.

 _Maybe I should have taken that contract…._

* * *

 _ **Thompson.**_

"Mmmdmmm?"

 _ **Thompson we don't have much time.**_

Everything felt still and mostly cold and stiff save for the throbbing of his right ankle, he shifted on the tough surface he was laying on trying to get comfortable. "Ummrugh"

 _ **Thompson they will return soon, now is your only opportunity.**_

Eyes fluttered open heart racing as memories returned, triggered by the strange stone floor flickering with shadows cast by torches. Statuesque limps greeted him in his peripheral vision, he shut them out. "No, no, no, no-"

 _ **This is your last chance, make a contract and you can save your friends.**_

"Dr. Mishkin said you aren't real."

 _ **Are you willing to pass up this chance?**_

He opened his eyes again meeting the unblinking ruby eyes, "Okay Kyubey, how do I make a contract with you?"

 _ **Agree to become a magical boy and fight for the greater good and I will grant you any wish you desire.**_

He chuckled, "So I could wish all of this away?"

 _ **If that is what you desire.**_

 _I'm going crazy anyways might as well try and get what I really want._ "And if I don't wish for this to stop I'll have the power to stop it?"

 _ **Of course.**_

"Alright make me a magical boy!"

 _ **What do you wish for?**_

"I want Wendy, Nate, Lee, Tambry, and Robbie to be my best friends forever."

A sudden pressure in his chest caused him to roll over on his back, his breathing becoming shallow and strained. Smoky light flowed out of his chest forming into a spinning ball. _Is this how stars are made?_ The strange substances blazed brightly leaving an ornate forest green egg, an eagle emblem wrought of a rose gold contrasting with the yellow golden base.

 _ **They're here, transform!**_

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own either Gravity Falls or Puella Magi Madoka Magica. This was created to get a story my heart wanted to sing out, and in no way will profit me aside from maybe spiritual gratification.

Authors Note: I guess this is technically a cross over; though characters from Madoka will be extremely limited will be kept, it will mostly be elements that I am borrowing. Aside from that enjoy and leave a review/comment if so inclined.


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